The Wit and Wisdom of Greg Behrendt

Look up this guy. Greg Behrendt. And his book (with Liz Tuccillo) "He's Just Not That Into You". It is a woman-empowering book that will change your dating life (if you have one... as if I do) forever.

The book can be summed up in the following very simple statements. Girls, think it over. It'll really help you dump that moron you've been dating for years but couldn't find a reason to:

1. If a guy likes you, he will do something about it. Neither hailstorm nor earthquake can prevent him from reaching for that phone and making you feel that you are important.

2. Conversely, a guy who will NOT DO ANYTHING --- not ask for your number, not call, not text, not invite you to dinner --- is not that into you.

3. If he's not that into you, SO THE HELL WHAT. Even Cindy Crawford has guys saying "What's the big deal?".

4. Have faith (haha... I have this on post-it on my desk). Don't give up. The first step is to be more confident and empowered. Men, apparently, are attracted to confidence and not self-pity.

5. A guy who is not asking you out --- FORMALLY --- on an OFFICIAL date is not that into you. (Ugh. Believe me. I learned this first hand). A guy who is into you would want to make it clear that he is interested in you beyond just being friends.

6. A guy who doesn't want to marry you is not that into you. (Ouch). Even if he doesn't want to marry you YET. Like I said, there is nothing to stop him --- not his emotional stability, not his finances, not his family --- if he truly wants to be with you.

7. A guy who doesn't want to be physically intimate with you is not that into you. Please. Guys love to touch.

8. A guy who doesn't want to improve himself for you is not that into you. The jobless, the bums, the still-lives-with-mom.... love can and should change a man's life. And if he's still not changing because of you, the harsh truth is he might change for some other girl

9. A guy who constantly breaks up (and gets together then breaks up) with you is not that into you. He just doesn't want to be lonely. The best thing to do with Mr. Needy is to sever all ties.

10. And finally, Don't waste the pretty! We're all pretty, girls. If you have ever been at the receiving end of a man's admiration (no matter how repulsive his fez is), if you have ever been at the receiving end of a man's attention and affection (boy, do i miss that), then YOU, my friend, ARE NOT THE LEAST BIT UGLY. So why are you going to waste your lovely face on a guy who isn't interested?

Commence the comments. I'm sure the guys would flip.